Casual Fridays

Do you know why men's casual Fridays dress down, wear a polo or tee shirt, never really took off?

A conspiracy by Brooks Brothers? Not enough variety from J. Crew? Sorbet colors aren't flattering?

Nope.

It's because they figured out their turkey wattle, jowly chins remained cleverly hidden under a buttoned to the neck, tie tightened ensemble. You understand, don't you, if it is spilling over, you can just pull, tug and tuck in whatever has taken on a life of its own. Voila! Gone.

Really, when did you last see any guy you know sporting an 'off the shoulder' number? Aside from coming face to face with age spots (otherwise euphemistically known as sun spots, which frankly doesn't sound any better than age spots) they have figured out that there is simply no place to hide what age and gravity has wrought. Alternatively, I suppose, they can upcomb their chest hair to cleverly conceal any drooping or sagging. After all, if a comb over isn't considered bizarre why should that maneuver?

I, for one, am adopting a French woman's style. I will swath myself in scarves, place a rubber band beneath my chin and over my ears, attaining the taut look I am going for. 

Still looking, oh so chic, in my off the shoulder number.